It really breaks my heart that we (Bipolar and other Mental Health) suffer so much from our disorders, and we can’t even catch a break in the disability department. I know that some of you have gotten disability but for the rest of us that have been trying for years and have been denied repeatedly it’s just not fair. I understand that they make it difficult because people take advantage but at the same time don’t they realize that we are mentally ill by definition and some of us can’t handle the process of paperwork, lawyers, and jumping through hoops that we are required to go through.
Well eventually after repeated attempts and getting denied over and over again, even with a lawyer, we resort back to getting income through finding a job, again. We do good for a little while, some of us even thrive while we are touching mania, and then the excitement wears off and the anxiety and depression or fear set in.
Now we need a break, from jobs, people, and the world because our brains are on overdrive and all we want is to hide from it all. So we take a day off or 5 and the inevitable happens we get fired. Next We go through a horrible self loathing stage and think that we are nothing more than a waste of space. All of this feels like it will never end so we hold our support systems near (for those of us that are lucky enough to have one) and try not to give in to the darkness of suicide, and if we make it through that, then we have to start the job search all over again until one day nobody wants to hire you because you have been let go from too many previous jobs.
I myself am going through the process right now, and it’s heartbreaking and difficult to have to prove your level of crazy to people that basically decide your fate, especially when you are usually trying to do the opposite and prove to the world and yourself that you’re really not that crazy. It does a world of hell on our mental state going through all of this just in hopes of being able to get some financial help so that we can put food on the tables without feeling ashamed for not being able to hold down a job.